This is weird

5 hours before the final. I am still not in the study mode. Cannot memorize more, and the brain stop working. I tried to focus but failed, facing all those authors and their opinions, it's clear, all clear on the notes, but I just can't link them together to make a complete sentence.

I'm becoming more and more weird these days. Facing myself, facing my friends, facing people. Don't know how to start talking and keep one topic moving. Can't make funny jokes. Can't let people feel comfortable when hanging out with me. I knew it but I cannot control it, which is such a sad feeling. There are something that you know it's bad but you cannot change it to become better at all, and there is no reason identified. Just lost in myself.

Keep questioning all kings of questions,hope will get rid of the status soon, but I will be patient. Everything will be alright. Maybe, maybe not. Or I just feel dumb about my life. Need changes immediately.